In their sixth full season of interleague competition, the Fort Myers Derby Girls have failed to defeat only two leagues in Florida. After five long years, FMDG finally has a chance to change that, as the Misdemeanors host the Molly Roger Rollergirls on Sunday, May 26th, at Bamboozles Skating and Event Center, 2095 Andrea Lane in Fort Myers.
Way back on Sunday, July 20, 2008, the Molly Roger Rollergirls came to Bamboozles (back in the days when it was known as “Generations”) and defeated FMDG by a score of about 132 to 91. Considering that the Palm City Punishers had skated less than ten interleague bouts at the time, a loss of only 41 points to a team that had taken third place at the 2008 Sunshine Skate Tournament was not a bad showing. However, both teams haven’t faced off since then. (A home-and-home series for the 2010 season was ultimately cancelled due to scheduling issues.)
The Molly Roger Rollergirls skated their way to a 10-and-2 record for 2012. Despite a recent injury that’s kept her out of play for a few months, rumor has it that team Captain MadNess will return to action with this bout. Keep an eye out for blockers such as Katie and Debo who just like to hit and to hit hard. Also, jammers such as Five Knuckle Bullet, Circus Peanut, and Snap Happy make it a habit of skating low, getting low, and sneaking through a pack. Beware of Ruthless Roxy, who scored an MVP Jammer award in a co-ed bout last month, as she powers her way through the pack.
They’ll need it against a Misdemeanors team that broke damn near every Fort Myers Derby Girls scoring record on April 28th in Bradenton. Jammers such as Peaches N Carnage, Klymaxx, and Phelony Phatbottom contributed to the first-ever FMDG team to score 200 points in a half, and over 300 points in a single bout (313, to be exact). Team co-captain Motley Bruze seems to have revitalized herself this season. Veteran Lil Debbie Smackcakes, in her sixth season with FMDG, continues to slow down jammers in the pack. Veterans Handi J and Deathrae are joined by rookie Maully Mustang, who might even take a jam or two with the star, as well as Hot Reillz, who seems to have really turned things on as a blocker going into her third season. Keep an eye on rookie Phelony PhatBottom, who appears to be the leading candidate for FMDG Rookie of the Year. Second-season skater Peaches N Carnage appears to have developed a near-inhuman knack for getting stronger as the bout progresses.
As if this bout wasn’t interesting enough, while FMDG has never defeated the Molly Rogers before, FMDG has also never lost at home in the month of May (Broward County/Gold Coast in 2008, Sintral Florida in 2009, Tri-County Rolling Militia in 2010, Tampa Bay Bruise Crew in 2011, Jacksonville’s River City Rat Pack in 2012). The Misdemeanors are also undefeated in their last ten bouts, dating back to November 2011. While the home winning streak may have finally ended at the hands of Gold Coast last month, the Misdemeanors have a chance to preserve their own winning streak, and start a brand-new home winning streak this month
It’s Memorial Day Weekend. Unless you work retail, you’ve got Monday off. Come to Bamboozles to witness the Misdemeanors come home to face the Molly Roger Rollergirls. Tickets are on sale now. Doors will open at 5:45 p.m.(earlier for those who buy tickets in advance), and the National Anthem happens at 6:30 p.m. BE THERE!!!
By Vince Hannity
The answers are: “203 days, or almost seven months,” “245 days, or just over eight months,” and “616 days, or just over one year and eight months.”
The respective questions are: “How long has it been since the Palm City Punishers last skated a bout in Bamboozles?”, “How long has it been since the Misdemeanors last skated a bout in Bamboozles?”, and “How long has it been since the Fort Myers Derby Girls skated on Saturday night at Bamboozles?”
All the waiting finally ends this Saturday, April 20th. Come back to Bamboozles at 2095 Andrea Lane in Fort Myers to see the best that the Fort Myers Derby Girls have to offer in our first-ever double-header at Bamboozles in our history! FMDG will put its fourteen-bout home winning streak, built up over two years, on the line. In exchange, they’ll have a chance to make history on Saturday night, as it could be the first time that both the Misdemeanors and the Palm City Punishers win on the same night.
The Misdemeanors come home to Bamboozles with one win in 2013 already under their belts. On March 24th, the Misdemeanors traveled to Fort Pierce to defeat the South Florida Roller Girls by a score of 218-to-178. While this makes the third consecutive win in the series between these two teams, fans from last year will remember that South Florida came to Bamboozles last August with a roster of only nine skaters, and only lost by three points. An influx of new skaters to SFRG promises to make this one a competitive bout. The Misdemeanors are not without new faces and promising veterans, however. Rookie Bionica DeMise will make her interleague debut, and look for the Chaos Cousins of Maully Mustang and potential triple-threat Phelony Phatbottom to have an impact on the bout. Keep an eye on rookie Rogue Rage, one of the graduates of Tampa Roller Derby’s juniors program, and expect her to figure heavily in the jammer rotation. Speaking of transfers from Tampa, Klymaxx will don an FMDG jersey in interleague competition for the first time in over two years since her two year stint with Tampa Roller Derby. Veterans Serenity Storm, Peaches n Carnage, Hot Reillz, and Handi J will pull double duty, skating with both the Misdemeanors and the Punishers.
In addition to The Streak being defended, two other interesting streaks will be on the line during the Misdemeanors’ bout. First, rookies Diana Hitcha and Rogue Rage, in a combined eight bouts in their adult careers, have never lost. Even more impressive is the eight-bout winning streak for the Misdemeanors, dating back to sometime around November 13, 2011. This Saturday, our first bout will determine if the Misdemeanors can make it nine in a row, with a chance for a perfect ten against the Molly Roger Roller Girls in May.
Your Saturday Night’s Main Event features the Palm City Punishers taking on the all-stars of the last league to win in Bamboozles, the Gold Coast Derby Grrls. Despite a down season in 2012, Gold Coast remains the only team from Florida to make it to WFTDA South Central Regional Playoffs and to end the tournament with a higher ranking than Tampa Roller Derby, long held as the elite league in the Florida Roller Derby scene. Just three weeks ago, Gold Coast defeated Tampa’s B-Team, the Bruise Crew, by nearly 300 points.
The Punishers return to Bamboozles having narrowly lost to Atlanta’s Rumble Bs in February, but with a force to be reckoned with in their blocking ranks. For those who must decide between getting hit by a runaway semi-truck or blockers like Anya Dixon, Bellicose Blondie, Jack Scratch Fever, Hot Reillz, Krystal Deth, and the rest, I recommend looking into that first, less-painful option. But this writer can’t help but wonder about potential question marks at the Punishers’ jammer rotation. Veterans Serenity Storm and Britzkrieg are givens to don the star, but rumors abound of an injury to Punishers MVP Yo Slammity Sam. Will this injury keep her out of Saturday night’s bout? And if so, who will take her place? Does the star go to second-season sensation Peaches ‘n’ Carnage, who will have had quite a few turns with the star with the Misdemeanors that night? Does it go to Pookie Bear, who seems to have fallen in love all over again with blocking? Does it go to the 2010 League MVP, Te Kill Ya Sunshine, rumored to be in her final season skating with FMDG? Or will another rise to take her place for Saturday night?
Tickets are still on sale from your favorite derby girl and at all the usual locations. You can also buy them on our website at http://www.
All home bouts are held at Bamboozles Skating & Event Center.
Bamboozles is located at:
2095 Andrea Lane
Fort Myers, FL 33912
All home game tickets can be purchased online through Brown Paper Tickets at: http://www.brownpapertickets.com/producer/15110